The Times Union (Albany, New York)
December 23, 2004 Thursday
4 EDITION

A day when the past makes the best present

By TIM O’BRIEN Staff Writer

It is said that what children most remember when they are adults are
not the big gifts they get for the holidays. Those presents you
knocked yourself out shopping for – the ones your kids said they
couldn’t live without – will be long forgotten.

What people remember are the traditions. Repetition is what builds
memories that last, and so it is that most people, when asked, will
tell you what their families did every time the holidays came around,
not what great gift they got in any one year.

That’s why some of Troy’s annual events are so important. Whether it
is teaching your child a lesson about helping others by participating
in the Winter Walk for Joseph’s House, or exposing them to arts and
music during the annual Victorian Stroll, these are the ways that
memories are built and remembered.

Christopher Maier, who will become Troy City Court Judge on Jan. 1,
said he remembers dressing up as a child to deliver baked goods to
the neighbors.

“Growing up, my brother would dress up as Santa and I would be an
elf, and we would go around to the neighbors’ houses and sing
Christmas carols,” he said. “That’s when I was really small.”

His family also cooked a Christmas Eve dinner and invited his
grandmother, and they would exchange some presents. Now he is doing
the same with his wife, Beth, and son Thomas, inviting his parents to
their home.

“Even as a child, you didn’t realize the significance of it at that
time,” he said. “Now I’m glad I have those memories.”

Developer John Hedley said his memories from his childhood in the
1940s differ from what happens today.

“Back when I was a little kid, there were nine children in the
family. We didn’t put up a Christmas tree until Christmas Eve,” he
said. “Now they put it up in July.”

He said he preferred when the tree went up the day before the
holiday, because it meant Christmas had truly arrived. His father
worked two jobs, so the family opened presents on Christmas Day.

“You never could open your present until the morning. Now you get 200
presents,” he said. “You opened your present, then you went to church
and then you had Christmas dinner at your house.”

Today, Hedley has four grandchildren and two adopted daughters from
Russia, ages 5 and 7.

“The tradition we have here is we have family come on Christmas Eve,”
he said.

He has other traditions, he said, but he’d rob them of their meaning
if he shared them. “It’s what you do for somebody else that nobody
knows about that matters,” he said.

For Troy Mayor Harry Tutunjian, his memories are of two Christmases
each season – both closely tied to his Armenian church.

“We’d go to Christmas Eve service at church, which would often run
until 10 o’clock,” he said. There would be a fellowship hour
afterward as well.

And his church also celebrated again on Jan. 6, the Orthodox
Christmas also known to some as the day the Wise Men came. The
children would attend services that morning too.

“In elementary school, the priest would send a note to get them out
to attend church and the children’s breakfast,” he said.

For City Council President Marjorie DerGurahian, holiday memories
conjure up shopping trips downtown with her mother. They’d go to
Green’s, Denby’s and Peerless department stores.

“When we finished up our shopping, we would go down to Hartigan’s,”
she said. “We’d go to see Santa Claus. I just remember walking down
those wooden steps.”

And every year, she’d be handed a candy cane after her chat with
Santa.

“Another important part of our tradition was going to find a
Christmas tree,” she said, which her family continues to do. “We go
out into the woods and cut one down. A real Christmas tree is a big
tradition in our family.”

She still has her grandmother’s bubble lights – they contain water
that bubbles when they heat up – and remembers fondly watching her
father wrapping the lights around the trees of her youth.

And so, whatever holiday you celebrate this time of year, don’t worry
if you can’t find the perfect gift. It’s the memories you make that
matter.

O’Brien’s column on Troy topics is published each Thursday in the
Rensselaer TU. He can be contacted at 454-5096, or by e-mail at
tobrien@timesunion.com.