Oklahoma guardsmen recognized Azerbaijan

OKLAHOMA GUARDSMEN RECOGNIZED AZERBAIJAN

DeFacto Agency, Armenia
July 31, 2006

A few days ago a delegation of the U. S. servicemen headed by the
Head of Okhlom-, sorry, Oklahoma National Guard Major General Harry
Wyatt visited Azerbaijan. According to the Azeri tradition, any
guest from the U. S. is received by the most high-ranked persons of
the identical profession. Naturally, the Major General was received
by the Azeri DM Safar Abiyev. The guest was shown the most important
sight of Baku: a monument to the Azeri nation’s outstanding chieftain
Heydar Aliyev situated on the square bearing his name. Having put
flowers to the legs of the bronze chieftain, the American General
with those accompanying him drove along the avenue named after the
father of the current President of Azerbaijan to the Republic MOD,
where he participated in a splendid banquet with black caviar and
Armenian cognac with the label "Khazar".

According to the tradition, a guest of any rank in the course of a
banquet in his honor must say a phrase, the point of which is that
he inveighs (recognizes, protects, respects – the options depend on
the guest’s professional activity and the degree of his modesty and
breeding) Azerbaijan’s territorial integrity. The guest with shoulder
straps and stripes did not surprise anyone with his modesty.

In the course of the banquet the Oklahoma General, being deeply touched
by the caviar with cognac and unusual total attention managed to utter
what he has learnt: "the U. S. recognized and recognize Azerbaijan’s
territorial integrity". However, it was not enough for the brave
General, so he went on swaggering. As if getting ready for the
assault of the Afghan fortress of Tora Bora, behind the strong walls
of which Usama Ben Laden’s phantom is hiding, he resolutely exhaled:
"within the frames of the USSR’s era".

Oh, General, oh, maladroit person, who remembers about the USSR’s
existence and has forgotten (or did not know) the map of the U. S.

President Wilson. And yet it is said there are no former presidents
in the U. S. Though Wilson – it was so long ago, in the first years
of Azerbaijan’s Sovietization, so the present generals could forget
about it.

The Azeri generals, by the way, turned to be more diplomatic than
their colleague from abroad, who can feel comfortable everywhere.

Having pretended that they know nothing about the Azeri Republic’s
refusal from the Azeri SSR’s succession, they amicably applauded
following their Minister.

The Azeri MOD Press Service informed with unconcealed pride that the
MOD Chief delivered an address, having noted the successful development
of cooperation between Azerbaijan and NATO. "We highly appreciate
the role the U. S. has played in the development of cooperation
between Azerbaijan and NATO. The Subdivisions of Azerbaijan’s Armed
Forces actively participated in the peacemaking operations in Kosovo,
Afghanistan and Iraq".

Having paid tribute to decency and reminding the Oklahoma inhabitant
of Azerbaijan’s great contribution to the NATO peacemaking activity,
Abiyev came to the point: "the Armenian – Azeri conflict has not been
resolved yet, the activity of the OSCE Minsk group dealing with the
conflict settlement cannot be considered satisfactory. We speak up for
the conflict’s settlement within the frames of the standards of the
international right and on the basis of observance of the principle
of Azerbaijan’s territorial integrity. We also request that the
Armenian troops should be immediately withdrawn from the occupied
territories. The Armenian party adopts a destructive stand in the
conflict’s settlement and does not wish to take into consideration
the current situation. Taking the above-mentioned into account,
Azerbaijan has to undertake adequate measures".

Abiyev did not verify who they "request" and who they have to
"undertake adequate measures" against. However, his expansive speech
made necessary impression: according to those present, without habitual
encirclement of the brave corporals the Oklahoma General worried,
not to say was afraid. What if the Minister has taken him as someone
else? Though he is a Minister, he tried cognac as well.

Worried Wyatt began to carefully remonstrate to his too zealous
interlocutor, stating that all the conflicts must be settled by
diplomatic way. "We are ready to help you in the issue", he said,
"the U. S. highly estimate the Azerbaijan’s efforts in the direction
and we are ready to help you. We believe Azerbaijan will demonstrate
its strong stand and will in the issue and at the negotiating table".

Abiyev, who a bit cooled off the words and affirmations, also started
affirming that personally he, Safar, was against any hostilities. In
general, Azerbaijan, which denied Soviet heritage, is still devoted
to the slogan "Peace to the world".

I do not know what about the American uncle, but I believe in his
words’ sincerity. Safar Abiyev really speaks up for peace and arms
race. First, arms race is the Azeri Minister’s favorite and quite
profitable business; second, it is easier, than to run around the
world searching for his own deserters and others’ disposable pilots.

Finally, being a son of a benefactor father, I. Aliyev every year
increases the Republic’s military budget twice. It should be noted
that Abiyev himself manages the state budget. According to the Azeri
proverb, a dog will not run away from meat, while Abiyev has been
brought up on the traditions of deep respect to the national wisdom of
his tribe. Why should one wage war, if it’s possible to buy armament
in Ukraine, on the points of collection of black and colored metal, and
then register it at the astronomic prices and put the difference in his
own pocket? And yet, a war is a war. What if after a current failure
one will have to lose his profitable post? For instance, the Karabakh
war made a lot of Ministers tender their resignation. Some were even
sent to jails. It should be noted that Abiyev is not Don Quixote.

Levon MELIK-SHAHNAZARYAN