TURKS STILL RULE EUROPE
Journal of Turkish Weekly, Turkey
Oct 30 2006
If you are reading me for the first time, please read to the end before
sending me hate mail. Yes, it is provocative to claim such a thing. You
may be asking yourself, "How come this poor nation which has no major
contribution to Europe other than Turkish coffee, doner(shwarma)
and kebap can rule Europe?" But, at the end of this article you will
probably have some sympathy for me, of which I need a lot. Love me!
We, Turks, with our tiny GDP and large population, are ruling Europe
without doing anything. Absolutely anything…We watch our Ibo Shows on
Sunday nights, we curse to referees and football players on Saturdays,
invade Cyprus and kill Armenians for the rest of the week, and that
is enough for Turks to rule Europe…
You may be thinking that I am becoming sarcastic again, and yes,
you are right!
But honestly, weren’t the Turks a determining factor in the EU
constitution referendums in Holland and France? How about the German
elections? Let’s think about the coming French elections, too.
Meanwhile, what is happening in Austria?
So, what are Turks doing to humbly enjoy this much importance?
Nothing, a million zeros without any significant digits…
Think about the referendums across Europe: What if Turkey had asserted
its position as "If there is a ‘Yes’ for this constitution, we will
not be joining Europe and we will skip out on our plans to be in
the union.". This move alone may result with 5 or 6 percent shift
between confronting opinions, which will be more than enough to get
the constitution approved.
In France, being anti-Turkish may earn you those crucial points to be
a president. Turkey saying that "We will increase our trade and aspire
to join EU if Sarkozy is elected. Oh meanwhile, Sarkozy privately
promised us to join Schengen by 2008" will probably neutralize
the Armenian game. Worse than that, it may cost Sarkozy the French
presidency… A dirty game to rule Europe!
How about Austria? The election billboards based on Turkey- EU
relations are helping the some political parties to increase their
share and hence power in the parliament. If someone can spice up
another "Armenian game" for Austria, Turkey can be one of the crucial
elements in determining the government in Austria.
But once again, what is the role of the Turks in this? Absolutely
nothing! The whole "European Turkey" discussion is going on with
little or no interference from the Turks. The European leaders promise
"carrots", show their "Armenian", "Cyprus", and "Kurdish" sticks, but
at the end of the day, they become locked inside these carrot-stick
policies…
Actually, I have a much more radical, sarcastic theory. Turks determine
the governments in major parts of Europe. They are enjoying this power,
which the Ottoman Empire could only dream of.
There is also that paradox, I suspect, which may be quite real. The
road to the power is made up of several parameters. Generally, there
are not too many differences between political parties regarding
economic, military, and social policies. But the main differences
appear as Turks enter into any one of these parameters.
So being against a "European Turkey" becomes a key determinant for
power. But after grabbing power, a new picture emerges in which
there is the necessity to integrate Turkey into Europe somehow
(full/privileged membership), as we have seen with elected leaders
changing position like Merkel and possibly, in the future, Sarkozy.
This is not an indication of the changing ideas but real politik.
Think otherwise, when Turkey rejects being part of the EU, the EU
presses Turkey more for completing reforms and being part of a larger
EU. When Turkey completes the reforms and expects end results, the EU
will start discussing whether Turkey is part of Europe or not. This
discussion will annoy Turks and Turkey will once again suspend being
part of Europe, and again Europe presses and so on….
Why is Turkey hard to reject or accept? This has many answers, which
I do not have time to discuss…
During the power play, this real politik ebbs from the popularity
of these elected leaders, because of their way of manipulating the
public opinion to grab the power. And once again, Turks cost these
leaders their thrones.
Also, in this political game, Turks owe most to the Armenian
Diasporas, Greek Cyprus, and other anti-Turkish lobby groups. It
is a pleasure to sit in our homes, watching TV, and being able to
determine the governments in Europe by just being fantastic "Conan
the Barbarian"-like characters in the poor European voters’ mind.
It is a pleasure dear guys, especially Armenians, Cypriots, and
Christian Europeanists! Work more. If you do so, and if I like it,
I will buy you candy.
A flashback to the original question… In a Europe, where the
differences between political parties and their leaders become less
and less visible, what are the main parameters to determine those
crucial 4-5 points for the power? You cannot deny that Turks or Turkey
joining Europe is among one of them.
Do you still think I am provocative? I may be…but whether Turkey
is European or not, Turks still and probably will rule Europe and
European politics. Now, you can kiss my hand!