EXCHANGE STUDENTS: A NEW DAUGHTER OR SON!
Mormon Times
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July 14 2009
Despite the fact that our two sons are our pride and joy, my wife
and I have always harbored a not-so-secret desire to have a daughter.
Now given that our oldest son is only 14, waiting for a daughter-in-law
or granddaughter to come into our lives means we may have to wait a
while. Of course the Lord works in mysterious ways and sometimes the
blessings come in unexpected ways.
Next month a lovely 16-year old from Armenia will be coming to stay
in our home for the next nine months to be a "daughter" to us and a
sister to our boys.
We’re hosting an exchange student, and we are completely thrilled!
Actually, we’ve tossed the idea around for a couple of years. But after
the wonderful experience of having sister missionaries live with us,
we decided to take the plunge and invite a new daughter into our home.
The process was relatively easy: we filled out a few pages
of information, we had a home visit from the World Heritage
representative, and then we went on-line to choose our new daughter. We
chose Anna from Armenia, because my wife is half Armenian and their
culture is very similar to my own Greek heritage.
There were dozens of wonderful young people from all over the world:
Germany, Japan, Italy, China, Denmark, Russia, and other even more
exotic locations. And honestly, there were at least 20 other young
people that we could have also been very happy with.
These amazing young people are willingly leaving their loving families
for a period of two to nine months. They travel half-way around the
world in order to get to know an American family better. They have
to pass a rigorous examination and screening procedure and only the
cream-of-the-crop actually make it through the selection process.
These students need to be fluent in English, they need to pass several
written essays, they need to have a relatively outgoing personality,
and they need to be healthy both physically and mentally.
What an amazing opportunity for us to get to know about their world
and culture, and for them to get to know about ours. I cannot think
of a more wonderful opportunity to open up our LDS home and culture
to a young person who probably hasn’t even heard of the church.
We plan to include her in our scripture study and prayers. To
have Family Home Evening together and even invite her to church,
if she wants to come. President Hinckley once asked us to become
"ambassadors" to the world. In some very small way, it feels like we
might accomplish that.
The expectations placed on us are only that we have the space available
in our home (although they can share a bedroom if necessary), that we
include them in our family meals, and that we treat them as if they
were a member of our own family, i.e.: that we encourage, advise,
teach, and above all, love them.
They, in turn, are expected to participate in our family activities,
to go to school, to do chores (if our own children do chores), to
follow the family’s rules, and to be a sister or brother to our other
children. World Heritage takes care of their visa, their registration
into school, their health insurance, and almost everything else.
And although the process is really intended to create one-on-one
relationships, it is also part of a larger effort that can help
contribute towards greater international understanding.
We don’t expect the time to be without any problems or stress. Most of
the students will become homesick at some point along the way. Perhaps
some cultural differences or misunderstandings might come up, but it’s
nothing more than parents already deal with in the relationships they
have with their own children.
Think you might be up for a challenge? There are more than 200 students
who are still hoping for a miracle … that a set of new parents from
America will choose them to share in this adventure! They need to be
placed in the next little while so they can start school with the rest
of the American kids. We’ve committed to having Anna for the whole
school year, but there are other shorter term introductory options
as well. Just take a peek at the Web site Or
if you want more information, contact Rachel Painter SW Regional
Coordinator at rachaelpainter@gmail.com. So let’s open up our
hearts, our American and LDS homes and welcome these wonderful young
people. Many years from now you just might have another "son" or
"daughter" who loves you somewhere around the world.
Dr. Elia Gourgouris is a nationally known speaker, relationship expert
and author of "The Multi-Platinum Marriage: Going form Surviving
to Thriving." Elia’s column, "Ask Dr. Elia," appears Tuesdays on
MormonTimes.com.