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83-year-old flute player, a giant apricot, Lithuanian reggae stars

The Sun (England)
May 29, 2010 Saturday
Edition 1;
National Edition

An 83-year-old flute player, a giant apricot, Lithuanian reggae stars
in spangly shorts. It must be Eurovision;
FULL POINTS OR NUL POINTS? YOUR GUIDE TO TONIGHT’S SONG CONTEST

by: LEIGH HOLMWOOD; JENNA SLOAN

THE collection of oddballs hitting the Eurovision stage tonight will
give Graham Norton a field day.

The Irish funnyman, below, will be commentating on the event in the
Norwegian capital Oslo on BBC1 from 8pm.

Armenia’s giant apricot stone and 83-year-old flute-playing fella are
ripe pickings for comedy gold. The spangly-panted Lithuanian reggae
act are also ideal comedy fodder … but sadly they didn’t make it
past the semi-finals.

Another talking point will be the battle between the babes and the
boys. Surprise frontrunner is sexy Safura, from Azerbaijan, but there
are other beauties from Portugal and Albania.

Among the boys is 19-year-old UK entry Josh Dubovie, with leading lads
from Israel and France too.

The spectre of reality TV looms large this year, with a lot of the
acts having started out on talent searches. The voting system has been
modified too, with viewers able to vote for their choice from the
start.

Here, LEIGH HOLMWOOD and JENNA SLOAN run the rule over the entries to
watch – and the most wacky acts.

Waterman’s Eurovision snub – see TV Biz pullout

HOW WELL DO YOU KNOW YOUR BOOM BANG A BANG?

CALL yourself a Eurovision expert? Well, did you know all this?

Last year’s UK entry, Jade Ewen, who finished fifth, is now in pop
band Sugababes.

There was a controversial winner the last time the UK hosted the
contest in 1998, Israeli transsexual Dana International.

We have been the hosts five times, with the contest held in London,
Edinburgh, Brighton, Harrogate and Birmingham. Ireland are the most
successful nation, with seven wins. Last year’s winners, Norway, are
the least successful, finishing last ten times. And they have the
worst record – scoring “nul points” four times.

The UK, who came joint first in 1969 with Lulu’s Boom Bang A Bang,
have twice finished last – in 2003, when Cry Baby by Jemini failed to
score a single point, and 2008. White outfits can lead to success,
with six previous winners wearing it. Gold and brown have scored just
one top place each. Female soloists are the most popular artists to
win, with 33 victories. And there have been 24 winning songs in
English.

The longest wait for a win was 45 years, for Finland, who triumphed in
2006. Austria, who won in 1966, are still waiting for another victory
– the longest gap in competition history. The UK have come second a
record 15 times. Since 1975 we have received 12 points 58 times,
second to Ireland, who have won 65 “douze points”.

SOME TO WATCH

UNITED KINGDOM

SONG: That Sounds Good To Me, by Josh Dubovie

ODDS: 175-1

It’s not looking great for poor Josh, who won Eurovision: Your Country
Needs You! Unsurprisingly the Essex boy’s song, from hit-maker Pete
Waterman, has a distinct Eighties Kylie/Rick Astley feel. It has been
panned by critics.

AZERBAIJAN

SONG: Drip Drop, by Safura

ODDS: 5-2

Azerbaijan have pulled out all the stops this year. Safura won their
version of Pop Idol and the track is written by the Swedish team
behind some of Britney Spears’ hits and is choreographed by Jaquel
Knight, who masterminded Beyonce’s Single Ladies. Safura’s the one to
beat.

GERMANY

SONG: Satellite, by Lena

ODDS: 11-4

Germany, for so long at the bottom of the Eurovision pile, have made a
real effort with Lena. The 19-year-old is billed as a Germanic Lily
Allen and ditches her mother tongue to sing in English. Satellite has
already been No1 in Germany and Lena has also had a No1 album.

ISRAEL

SONG: Milim, by Harel Skaat

ODDS: 8-1

This dry and dreary ballad is inexplicably one of the favourites to
win. Singer Harel – a runner-up on Israel’s version of The X Factor –
has had huge success at home, where he has toured extensively and sold
a shedload of records.

DENMARK

SONG: In A Moment Like This, by Chanee And N’evergreen

ODDS: 14-1

Denmark could win a lot of Eastern European votes with singer
N’evergreen – aka Thomas Christiansen – already a big success in
Russia and Ukraine. He is joined by sexy Chanee, who sang in a TV
group called Nubian Frauleins.

IRELAND

SONG: It’s For You, by Niamh Kavanagh

ODDS: 28-1

Graham Norton’s (admittedly biased) tip, Niamh won Eurovision for
Ireland in 1993. She also appeared on the soundtrack of movie The
Commitments and has performed at the Grammy Awards. Her soaring
ballad, complete with panpipes, could land some “douze points”.

BELGIUM

SONG: Me And My Guitar, by Tom Dice

ODDS: 20-1

The song does exactly what it says on the tin – a simple tune
featuring 20-year-old Tom with his trusty guitar. The rock ballad is
belted out in English and is being seen as a viable alternative to a
lot of the other more glitzy frontrunners in Oslo.

CYPRUS

SONG: Life Looks Better In Spring, by Jon Lilygreen And The Islanders

ODDS: 100-1

Could be the UK’s “second entry” – Jon, 22, is a Welshman and his pub
band members hail from Scotland, England, Norway and Cyprus. Jon was
spotted by Cypriot songwriters on Google. Long odds but the ballad’s
gone down well.

THE WACKIEST

ARMENIA

SONG: Apricot Stone, by Eva Rivas

ODDS: 11-2

Eva, 22, who sings in English, is joined on stage by a giant apricot
stone. There’s also an 83-year-old bloke playing a flute, left. The
song tells of the stone which Eva has hidden in her head. It’s nuts,
but it could win.

BELARUS

SONG: Butterflies, by 3+2

ODDS: 150-1

The performance from the earnest five-piece – made up of, yep, three
women and two chaps – sees the girls sprouting wings just like, you’ve
guessed it, butterflies. Like all classic Eurovision entries, it’s all
just a bit weird.

SPAIN

SONG: Algo Pequenito, by Daniel Diges

ODDS: 75-1

Curly-haired Daniel looks like a cross between Leo Sayer and Michael
Ball, and the children’s TV host’s act includes fairground sounds and
creepy-looking clowns. Not so much childhood fantasy as scary
nightmare.

SERBIA

SONG: Ovo Je Balkan, by Milan Stankovic

ODDS: 66-1

Milan stands out with his blond fringe and eccentric clothing. He’s
been described as a cross between Heather Mills and Su Pollard. With
looks like that, no wonder he shot to fame on a reality TV show.

MOLDOVA

SONG: Run Away, by Sunstroke Project And Olia Tira

ODDS: 100-1

This group bust a move to the sound of a saxophone. The song features
blonde Olia, a morning TV star in Moldova. Think Holly Willoughby but
with less self-awareness.

GREECE

SONG: OPA, by Giorgos Alkaios And Friends

ODDS: 25-1

This starts with heavy breathing then progresses to homoerotic
acrobatic moves with blokes dressed in rubber. It has a chance of
winning but the broke nation will be praying they don’t or they’ll
have to host next year.

ICELAND

SONG: Je Ne Sais Quoi, by Hera Bjork

ODDS: 17-1

Another near-bankrupt country hoping it doesn’t win. Hefty Hera
doesn’t have the talent of her famous namesake but she could cause a
stir across Europe … just like her country’s volcanic ash cloud.

From: A. Papazian

Andres-Papazian:
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