Stop laughing, it’s US policy that’s the joke
Sydney Morning Herald, Australia
July 22 2006
Email Print Normal font Large font Mike Carlton
July 22, 2006
ST PETERSBURG, Tuesday. The President of the United States, unplugged.
GWB: Hey Blair, howya doin’? Like your tie. You British do stripes
real good.
TB: Thank you so much.
GWB: Not a problem. Now gimme your take on this Middle East shit.
TB: Well, you see, you’ve got Hezbollah …
GWB: Remind me, Blair. Them the Jewish guys or the Islamic guys?
TB: They’re the bad guys.
GWB: Got it. Who’s the chick over there with the hot boobies?
TB: Do you mean the German Chancellor, Angela Merkel?
GWB: Kraut, huh? Now here’s what we do with the Middle East thing:
the Israelis get two weeks to kick ass, let the UN screw up, then
Condi fixes a ceasefire. Sound good to you, Blair?
TB: Just what I was thinking myself, actually.
GWB: Done deal. But, hey, gotta get back to Washington. Some serious
stuff goin’ down with Cheney and Rummy tonight.
TB: Iraq?
GWB: Nope. New York Yankees playin’ the Boston Red Sox. Got $100 on
the Sox with Dick.
TB: I hope that microphone is not turned on, George.
POOR bloody Lebanon. Three thousand years ago the great cities of
Byblos, Sidon and Tyre were at the civilised centre of the known
universe, their Phoenician traders commanding the Mediterranean to
Spain and beyond, venturing as far north as the tin mines of Cornwall.
In the centuries since, what we know as modern Lebanon has been raped
and pillaged by the predators of history: Persians, Greeks, Romans,
Armenians, the Crusaders, the Ottomans, the French, the Syrians. Now,
not long recovered from a hideous civil war, a fragile Lebanese
democracy reels beneath the hammer blows of the Israelis.
George Bush, Condoleezza Rice and, for that matter, John Howard,
can bleat forever about Israel’s right to defend itself, but we are
witnessing an obscenity. On all sides. The targeted Israeli air strike
which murders children in a Beirut suburb is as much a crime against
humanity as an indiscriminate Hezbollah rocket crashing into downtown
Haifa. There are no gradations of immorality. It is total.
Bush’s buffoonery in St Petersburg – manhandling Merkel, dropping the
"shit" word – were funny or offensive, depending on your take on these
things. But there is no humour in the fact that American policy in
the Middle East now lies in ruins. The neo-conservative fantasy of a
swift war in Iraq magically spreading peace and democracy throughout
the region has brought nothing but catastrophe.
Sooner or later, when Hezbollah has killed enough Israeli civilians,
and the Israelis have killed enough Lebanese, some sort of ceasefire
will happen. But new hatreds will pile upon the old. The seeds are
sown. Next, the whirlwind.
HARD to tell if the NSW Opposition Leader, Peter Debnam, is cynically
playing the race card, is in utter ignorance of the workings of the
common law, or is just plain stupid. Or all three.
Ever since the Cronulla riots, he has been banging on about "200
Middle Eastern thugs" who, he claims, are terrorising 4 million people
from Newcastle to Nowra. He was at it again this week, bent on all
hell breaking loose if, by some chance, he wins the state election
next year.
"At dawn … on the 25th of March my instruction to the police
commissioner will be to take as many police as you need and charge
them with anything to get them off the streets," he bellowed.
Charge them with anything? I put that very question to him on
radio on Wednesday and, yes, he confirmed that was exactly what he
intended. Anything. Which can only mean that he expects police officers
to trump up charges, forge records of interview, perjure themselves
and generally pervert the course of justice in the courts before which
the unfortunate victims are dragged. There can be no other conclusion.
And who are these 200? Debnam has it in his silly head that the
police recorded 200 car numberplates during the revenge riots
post-Cronulla. It is therefore a simple matter of arresting the
owners. All of them. On any charge. "Going through a red light!" he
shouted at one stage, rocketing to new heights of absurdity.
This is exactly the sort of political harlotry that the Director of
Public Prosecutions, Nick Cowdery, warned about in a recent speech
to a teachers’ conference.
"Crime is politically ‘sexy’ because it is an easy drum to bang and it
makes a loud and instant political noise," Cowdery said. "Politicians
jump on the fear of crime that we all have (to an extent) and the
media beat it up for all they are worth."
Exactly. If Debnam really means what he says, he is a threat to
democracy and the rule of law. As we saw on Four Corners on Monday,
democracy is not a priority with the NSW Libs these days.
A rugger bugger stands his ground
IN THIS country you can spill a man’s beer, kick his dog, or even
bed his wife; after a bit of shouting, life goes on.
But suggest, however objectively, that his code of football might be
in a bit of trouble and there is blue murder in the air.
My crystal ball piece here last week predicting that rugby league is
in long, gradual decline provoked an astounding response from dozens
of readers. Much of it was gutter filth from evident psychopaths. Goes
with the territory, I guess.
Quite a few emailers, chips firmly on shoulder, were outraged by
my heinous crime of attending a private school 43 years ago. Ho ho,
the witty jibes about poofs in tweed jackets and leather patches.
Useless to point out, I suppose, that I did not bag any part of the
game of rugby league. In fact, a good State of Origin game is worth
a watch. Union, especially in defence, has learned a lot from league
and can still do so.
My argument is simply this: 10 years or so down the track, to fight
off the competition from Australian football and soccer, the two
rugby codes will merge into a hybrid of the best of each, discarding
the rubbish.
The league scrum is a farce, for example. But so are union’s endless,
pedantic penalties at the breakdown; they bore the pants off even
the most devoted rugger bugger.
Eventually there will be a new and better international ball game. It
will be called rugby.